For about two years I've been wanting to say something about why I do not post here as often as I used to. It seems like I had something to say almost every day back in 2006, when I started blogging. Here's what I think: Life is seasonal. There's a time for writing more and a time for writing less. Same with talking. I think my assignment has been more to think deeply these past two years rather than share constantly or often. I believe I have some sort of a hermit calling on me. Graham Cooke has a little book called Hiddenness & Manifestation where he writes about seasons of quietness and listening, even dark nights of the soul, contrasted with seasons of God's manifest presence.
I have been going through my own dark night of the soul, which I believe is part of the normal Christian life for those who ardently pursue Christ. I believe that when you are going through something, you really can't explain it or write about it. Part of the going-through is confusing. Also, it seems to me that much of what we experience with God is secret and not meant to be published. I had a dream once where I was kneeling at an alter and I heard God tell me something and as soon as I "got it", I turned around and grabbed the telephone and called a best friend to tell him what I heard. There's nothing wrong with being excited about hearing God or receiving a personal word through someone. It is thrilling when you believe you are hearing God. It's good news usually. Perhaps my little dream would mean something else to someone else and there are multiple meanings to pictures for one person as well. But at that moment, it gently meant to me that it might be wiser to sit longer in God's presence and reflect on the word and write it down, rather than getting on the telephone. There's nothing wrong with sharing words, but the point to me was that God is a person who desires intimacy with me and God has put that desire in me. Everything I hear is not meant to be shared. Wouldn't it be weird to tell one friend everything that another friend has told you?